THE CREATOR ROLE

To my mantra in times when nothing else mattered…  

KB

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In 2020 I went through a twelve-day depressionary period, otherwise known as situational or short-term acute depression, which I would describe as a sliver of a taste of what millions of folks living with clinical depression deal with daily. This small section of my life gave me my biggest lessons. 

What saved me during this period was the long list of healthy habits I had previously created: out of bed on the first alarm, yoga first thing in the morning (during this time I had to forego meditation), exercise, phone calls to loved ones, volunteer work, and very open communication with my life partner. Without this list of scheduled and regular habits, that period of situational depression would have looked very different. The process I had created held me over during a time when willpower, motivation, and inspiration were non-existent.

I became utterly convinced that the life we create for ourselves on our best days is the most important gift we can give to ourselves on our worst days. 

When existential anguish was crushing, I kept my mind focused on one word: Participate. I could sense that the world was moving on, with or without me. The world would turn whether I was laying in the fetal position or attending to my work. I was struggling to make sense of it all but could not deny that I was here, having this experience, and that even if I tried, I could not withdraw myself from it, truly. I felt a choice slapped in front of me: Choose to participate in what is with intention and hope, or don’t. Either way, you’re here. Either way, you have to make a choice. 

This choice, more so than dedication to deliberate creation of habits or intentional routines, defines The Creator Role. The Creator Role is our choice to participate. 

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Lesson learned: Creators recognize that we must make a choice to participate in what is, and that when we do so, we intentionally contribute to its meaning.